Reasons Why I Would Be a Good Housewife

 1. I won't make you go through the insanity of actually getting engaged, planning an expensive wedding, and all that newlywed annoying nonsense. We can happily live in sin, playing house.

2. I don't cook, but I do bake. I will fatten you up like you're Hansel (or Gretel) and I'm a wicked witch living in a gingerbread house. In fact, I may even bake us a gingerbread house to live in.

3. Correction: I'll cook, if you'll clean up.

 4. I will do all this cooking and baking in a cute apron and a sexy outfit.

5. I can sew your buttons back on when they fall off and patch up the holes in your favorite jeans.

 6. I will not bother you or try to talk about important matters while you are watching the game or playing Portal 2. I will, however, make you and your friends treats, keep the beers coming, and decorate the house in theme for Superbowl Sunday or your Call of Duty tournament.

 7. I will not ask when we will be ready to have kids, because I've already decided the answer: Never.

8. We do not have to visit my family for Christmas. Or yours, if you don't want to. We can stay home alone, go to Fiji, whatever we want.

I expect the fellas to come flocking, now. ;)
TishTish, personal